Dick Cheney tunneling through this white jazz room on the eternal equinox. I play favorites. One of my favorite turns on the roller rink was greeted by Isotoner robots.
The Isotoner robots will get you too. We may be getting farfetched here. I'm concerned about the patient. He's..She's...they're exhibiting signs of total recall. You know, the kind that lands them in their aforementioned life in Japan where they performed lobotomies on North Koreans for rupies. The gypsies loved their work and hired them on as stranglers for the circus. Did I say stranglers?
Meet Ricki Todd. Ricki Todd is a strangler. It's not so much a profession as it is a hobby. He sees these white lines up and down the faces of women and takes it as a sign to kill. We're thinking of putting him on the payroll with Al Roker and Jermaine Jackson (our finest assassins).
Let's think a spell here. Here's this equation:
Milk.
You see where I'm going with this? Do you see how you can't solve for X? No, it's just plain old milk.
Walking through the forest I notice that I'm holding a pan of eggs. I taste them and they are delicious. This proves nothing. They may be terrible eggs, but after walking in a forest on your own you notice these things.
I tried out for track the other day. I'm 30, but I figure I had a shot. If I could beat a 15 year old...I don't know how to end that sentence. But, I didn't make the team.
Two years later he wondered the corridors of the airport to the beat of a stopwatch. He was determined to beat his record. And he did. 34 televisions going at once. But, this was back in '82.
Drug stores are our best form of revenue. When I say "us" I mean my fellow Tigers. We have created a shrine of Sri Lanka and we will continue to piss on it until the ghost of Arthur C. Clarke tells us once and for all what the hell the last hour of 2001 was about. Sure, everyone has their theory, but we need definite certitude.
CERTIFICATION - Product complies with DHHS rule 21CFR subchapter 1 applicable at the date of manufacturer. Can anyone make sense of this? It was the only message aliens have ever sent me. If you have similiar messages, please write.
All right. It's time to have it out: yes, I am from another planet and yes, I will tell you that flossing is a waste of time. Other than that, you know as much as I do.
The Chinese, they really get me. I'm thinking of moving to China come summer. But, what about the government and such? It's not really the government, it's about the same; it's the food. For the life of me I can only eat cheeseburgers. I fear for my life. You shouldn't fear, there's McDonalds there. Ah, yes. Well, now I have solved that problem. I can leave now. I love you all. Especially you, Ronald.
NAVIGATIONAL ERRORS HAVE OCCURED AND YOU HAVE BEEN SENT TO THE UNITED AIRLINES HOMEPAGE. HERE YOU MAY ENJOY THE LUXORY OF MISPELLING ALPHABET CASES AND PUNCTUATION DISASTERS. I ALWAYS WANTED TO BE A WRITER. IT'S JUST THAT THIS GIG...
Did you see that man? That page? What was he talking bout, you dig? Sheeeeeeeeeeeet, I don't know. But, that's some funky soul you eatin'. Sure, it's Regis Philbin, died but two hours ago. Where them white devils? Come calling me to sleep, man. Hell, it's hot up in here. You see Dick Cheney been back again? Yeah, crawlin' through dem tunnels again. Sheeeeeeeeet!
The Star Plant is by far our best creation. You simply use some shake and bake and a bit of Coca Cola. Add the cartoon version of the Hobbit and viola! Magnificent, really.
I love your work.
Thank you, Charles. How is Patagonia?
She's fine, and she sends her love.
Really, in the form of what, pray tell?
A BJ, old sport. Let's look at the funnies.
What's on TV? I hope it's something good? What if they don't exist anymore. What? Mormons. That would be a real shame. I mean really, what if they didn't exist? What would happend? I know. Oh, well. What else is bothering you?
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