Friday, July 31, 2009

This One is About My Goldfish

MY BIRTHDAY - JUNE NINTHI will be turning 28 years of age. I expect Yahoo Hallmark cards and such from the outside world.As for the inside world - I need a blowjob. Any women who are in the Seattle area during the ninth of June should write in and give me their location. I will promptly come down and you may administer a GOOD blowjob to me.I will not accept anything other than GOOD work. GREAT would be nice, but I understand that you don't know me and may feel a bit uncomfortable.But, I am a forgiving man.I don't believe that this is too much to ask. Especially, since I haven't asked anyone in the Internet community for a blowjob before.I'm turning 28, ladies. Do you know what that means?Neither do I. But, for now on it means - BLOWJOB TIME.In fact, I believe it should be a new tradition: you turn 28, you get head.IT JUST MAKES SENSE!Christ, how hard is it to give a stranger on the Internet a blowjob? Seattle is full of computers, I'm sure some of you live in the area.Hell, even if you don't - fly in! I'll let you stay at my place.Your choice of Hotpockets or Kraft Dinner.Look at me, even on MY birthday I'm giving.Offering you a place to stay and food to eat - what a guy!This is going to be the best birthday ever, and I wish you all - everyone around the world (except people in Florida and Texas) the best Matt's Birthday ever!Join in the celebrations! Let peace on Earth reign!And blowjobs.Thank you,MattP.S. I will continue with new material soon - I leave for Vegas tomorrow. Look for a man with a journal in a strip club writing frantically.God Bless

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