Monday, October 19, 2009

Robopaul

Let me tell you the story of robopaul5000. robopaul5000 was so advanced and, like, smarter than humans that he need not capitalize his name. robopaul5000 was constructed by Dutch engineers in the year 5050, but was sent back in time to...you guessed it - to get food.
But, unlike that one dude with the cheeseburgers, robopaul5000 was sent back in time to find Taco Bell. robopaul was instructed by the Lord Rameus to find "those burritoes with ground beef, bean, veggies, and potatoes." In the times of 5050, potatoes no longer exist and the food of choice is normally cheese sandwiches. So, you can see how a burrito with potatoes would sound pretty good, huh?
So, robopaul5000 was sent to the year 2005, but instead of finding a Taco Bell he found himself in a small African village and of course they were not advanced enough to build tacos with potatoes in them.
So, robopaul5000 befriended a young boy named Earl (yes, Earl. I know it's Africa but it's possible that Earl's parents wanted a weird name) and Earl helped robopaul5000 journey to an airport, some five countries away.
On the way, robopaul5000 remembered that he could travel through space as well as time. He remembered this when Earl really got annoying with all the stupid questions about robopaul5000's laser cannons and stuff.
So, robopaul5000 travelled to America where he found, like, 9000 Taco Bells and bought out all the burritoes, shrunk them to the size of atoms and then returned to the year 5050.
Lord Rameus was so pleased with robopaul5000's work that he knighted him and robopaul5000 will never forget his adventure and his lovable friend, Earl.
Oh, and Earl managed to find his way back to his village, but died of dysentary in the year 2009.
See how I turned the story sad using only one sentence? Wasn't that awesome. I bet you cried.

No comments: