Wednesday, August 18, 2010


How About a Night of Sparkling Romance, Bitch?

You know, you have beautiful eyes. Has anyone ever told you that?
I was looking at you from afar and I found my heart breaking all over again, seeing someone as lovely as Maryln Monroe – I must be with you, if only for one night!
Listen to me, you fawn, you spirit of love: I want to take you out tonight.
How does Canlis sound? Good? I will buy you the most delicious meal available, and shower you in Champagne. The appetizers will be succulent truffles, and the dessert, a fine Baked Alaska or Cherries Jubilee. The main course, however, is a surprise.
After dinner, I will take you to the most eloquent dance club in town and we'll dance to the Big Band and drink the most expensive of wines.
Then, maybe, we'll just travel around the city in my Lincoln Towncar and see what the night brings.

Later that evening....

You fucking bitch! What do you mean you want to go home? What the fuck? It's ten, for Christ's Sakes? You think that meal was free? You could at least accompany me to the fucking club!
Christ, I don't believe this shit. I mean, I didn't think you'd put out or anything, I wasn't expecting that; but, I didn't expect nothing. I mean, at least a kiss, but now you're leaving after just dinner?
I bet you do this to all the guy's: get a free meal, get liquored up and then go fuck your ex-boyfriend and laugh about what a tool I am! Huh!
Fucking bitch!
I don't fucking believe this. Fine, fine, I'll take you home, your majesty. Shit. What a fucking joke.

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