Sunday, January 10, 2010


I Feel Like I Should be Writing About Michael

It's true.

But, the problem is – I don't care.

I didn't care with O.J., Robert Blake, Kobe - any of them.

I haven't bought a Michael Jackson record since I was a kid. I guess if Trent Reznor stabbed three in a Boston garden, maybe I'd give a shit.

No, I think I only looked at the story twice and from what I gleaned it seems that he slept in the same bed with children and that he gave them alcohol. Why read the rest? I'm like you – I only read the dirty parts. The other parts could have been complete explanations for his behavior – like his bed is six acres and the kid was sleeping a few yards away and that maybe a Budweiser was mistakenly labeled "Capri Sun."

But, from what I read, it pretty much made me think he was at least capable of molesting children. If for no other reason that he doesn't understand how society views people: guilty until proven innocent.

Last night I came home and looked out on my back community porch and saw that some heathens had bashed apart a heating lamp and an umbrella.

I then saw a guy walking his dog and asked him what had happened.

He explained that he didn't know, but that I needn't worry – he would alert the manager.

My first thought was – Holy shit! Does he think I did it?

Nothing in his voice should have made me think that, but it was my first thought. In fact, I don't like being around any crime scene – I always figure somehow I'm going to be blamed.

Maybe it's because I'm a weirdo or a drunk, hell I would even finger me if I didn't have the memory of not doing it.

That's how life is.

Go to a party and knock over a vase when no one is looking and then watch everyone turn on each other.

Christ, even if they don't go after the weirdo they'll go after you; because, hey everyone knows the old phrase "It's always the person you least suspect."

Case in point: let's say you get murdered tonight. Now, think about everyone you know. I bet you could find motives for anyone to kill you. Why not? If they don't have any reason to, that's just all the more reason to get away with it.

Guilt? C'mon. There's no way to prove shit.

There are probably people out there that will admit to doing something they didn't just to get someone off their backs. In fact, that's how the courts work: if it looks like you're going to get the death sentence for something you didn't do, you might as well lie and say you did it so you only get life.

No, there is no justice on Earth and never will be.

Maybe there's karma, but I haven't seen it doing a whole helluva lot for George W. Bush. The day he gets syphilis and his testicles shrink up into his spine, maybe I'll believe in it.

But, on the other hand, I live a life of degeneracy and I've been rewarded for it time and time again – so maybe the universe does issue out credits of good and bad? Maybe G.W. is slowly rotting from the inside out and no one is reporting it. We all know the media lies.

A karmic universe would be nice.

Well, we'll all know what really went down with Michael if he all of a sudden turns up on the cover of Time with Ebola eating that lily-white face.

Many have remarked that the media convicted Mike before he had a fair trial. It could be true. The media is normally full of shit and I would believe it in a second. But, then you have to be prepared to believe that Hitler got a bad rap and maybe he was some humanitarian on par with Gandhi.

Accept confusion: it makes the world go around.

Think the media is lying to you: celebrate it. Maybe it will give you hope that thousands aren't dying all over the Mid East for oil or some rich kid's ego.

Think your wife cheated on you: enjoy it. Maybe that means you finally paid off the karma for that time you lit a homeless person on fire.

There's a bright side to everything.

But, not for Jackson. He's doomed and everyone knows it.

Broke, career in the pooper, a flank of Nation of Islam security guards that are soon going to realize he's white: Michael is fucked.

Yes, Michael may not have molested children, but he does have to answer for every shitty record he made after Thriller.

So, in summation: karma rules the Earth, G.W. is being eaten from the inside out by tsetse flies, Michael Jackson will soon be white goo on the wall of some N.O.I. temple, and the media is lying to you.

P.S. Everything you just read is media.

Action Jackson

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